♦ An investor went to a tax expert and said: “If I give you $1,000, will you answer two questions?” The expert replied: “Certainly. And what is the other question?”
♦ Q: How do you humble a person that flaunts their wealth?
A: Have them fill out a tax return.
♦ America is the land of opportunity. Everybody can become a taxpayer.
♦ IRS MOTTO: “We’re not happy until you’re not happy!”
♦ Did you hear about the cannibal tax accountant? She charges an arm and a leg.
♦ A window sign in Chicago: “Tax Returns Prepared – Honest Mistakes Are Our Specialty.”
♦ A funny story relayed by Internal Revenue Service call center agents: Taxpayers sometimes call in to complain they have mistakenly received letters intended for someone named “Levy.”
♦ Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But then I repeat myself. — Mark Twain
Next: The Unknown Tax Comic – Halloween Edition
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